Just Asking Questions

I have a tendency to start fights. I really don't know why; I have some strong opinions, but most people do, too, and I think I'm much more mild than most. I hate arguing; I always concede to people; I'm pretty damn nice. I really try! I don't think I've ever, EVER picked a fight! 

And yet, I do somehow seem to start them. Usually I don't really even know why. 

I saw a post online. Someone wrote a single sentence: 

Lore that is not actionable is excessive.

I paused, unsure if I agreed. It had been reposted by someone I liked enormously! It was agreed to by others! But something was gnawing at me. It's probably the same impulse that causes all the other fight: I wanted to know more and I wasn't sure I agreed. 

The minutiae aren't important, really. It started a wide-ranging discussion and I think other people started their own threads and soon I saw some of the people who had initially agreed with the post I was questioning make their own defenses. None of them answered in my thread; probably assuming it was hostile territory. And, after a few hours, people stopped talking and that was that. 

****

Perhaps "fight" isn't the right word. Nobody got too upset or anything; I don't think any feelings were hurt. It wasn't really a fight at all. But there did seem to be "sides." I had people telling me to ignore the advice of anyone who says such; I had people start talking about the virtue of worldbuilding vs GMing. But I really didn't intend for their to be sides; I didn't even think I disagreed so much as I just didn't know if I agreed. 

And yet it felt like an argument had sprung up. I've been chewing on it since, and I'm worried that maybe that's the only way it could have gone. I asked a question, people answered; an answer is always going to take a side, in some sense. Maybe I didn't intend to take a side by asking a question--so what? In asking a question, you are calling for an answer. And in doing so, yeah, people might argue. Asking questions appears neutral; but in practice, the nebula in which you're hiding must draw in answers, and all that those bring with them.

So now I'm wondering if I'm a bit of a hypocrite. "Don't fight!" I saw, tossing chum into the waters. "I'm an innocent!" I declare, watching smarter, more experienced people than I tear at each other while I nod and take notes. 

I've done this all my life. I like asking questions. Nearly all the time it's easy and uncontroversial. Ask a teacher about homework. Ask my dad about taxes. Ask my mom about black oxalis. 

But sometimes, and I sort of wonder if part of me knows, it's not to easy. Ask a group of veteran gamers about whether they need lore? And then act like you just wanted some lofty, philosophical answer? On the internet? What, are you dumb? 

****

Actually most of the answers were helpful. I really did take a lot from reading what people had to say. Most everyone who commented praised lore and agreed that in general you should have a well-written world. But the truth is, I wasn't sure I agreed with them either; when everyone starts to take one side on something where I know there IS a valid alternative I start to wonder what we're missing. 

So I went looking. 

Turns out I actually liked the article it came from. It answered my questions, which were sincere: What is actionable (things the players can in any way interact with) and what is excessive (things the GM finds fun to write but is simply not going to come up in play and should be left out of the actual game session; nobody wants to listen to your encyclopedia article.) 

Had I actually looked I could probably have found this article and found my answers. Instead, though, I posted a question and waited for people to give me answers. I learned a lot about lore, and people's playstyles, and how people define lore, or struggle to; I learned a lot.

But now I'm also learning a little about myself, maybe. Why do I ask questions when I could actively seek the answer? I know how to search the internet. I can read. I can click around or even just ask "Does anyone know where this is from?"

But instead I asked for reactions, didn't I? What was I expecting? 

I probably learned more this way. But I do fear I caused a lot of other people to have to get kinda worked up over something trivial. Is that messed up of me?